Horribly Beautiful

So, here we are - a couple (well less than) weeks away and this tour will be over. This has been a wonderful opportunity for Scot. I am so happy that he has been able to do this.

On the other hand, this has been the hardest five months of my life. I have looked back through my life and everything I thought was hard pales in comparison to this. In a previous post, I wrote about how hard it was. Another thing that came to mind was the fact that you come home to an empty house - yes, we have roommates, but it is not the same. It is the house that you share with someone and that someone is now a ghost. All the pictures, smiling down at you. All the memories. Even the knick-knacks and books he loves speak to you. I have realized that being alone is OK. It is the lack of that person that hurts.

I have been getting texts and talking to my husband about his days and nights on the tour. This pretty much sums it up - get up early (if you are NOT a morning person and can not even think about being alive and coherent at 6:45/7am, most tours will not be for you), get in the van, drive to the space, unload the truck with a. a union crew, b. highschool students (which has been a very good experience at time) or c. unload themselves. Then, it is prepare for the show - wigs, costumes, prosthetics, make-up, etc. Then, by around 10:00/10:30 - on with the show. Show is over around noon or so. Then, load back up the truck, grab some lunch and it is either onto the next destination or back to the hotel, depending on where they are the next day. If they get an afternoon/night off, usually they go to a mall or hang out, do laundry, watch TV, check email, surf the net. At night, movies, other types of entertainment (bowling was one night recently), taking in the locals and the local sites and more than likely drinking. Hey, they are doing a children's show - this would drive anyone to drink. On weekends, more or less of the same. If you have been looking at the other blogs from the people on tour, you will get a more in depth view of it - especially the time off.

My days have been working multiple jobs that have nothing to do with what I want to do with my life - except for my teaching artist job, working on shows at night (up until the end of October). After the show was over, I would spend my nights looking for work, watching TV, going out and seeing friends, going to shows and gearing up for the next production(s) with Nosedive Productions. Also, trying to organize the house - a little, take care of a wonderful cat and do the normal pay bills and adult shit.

So, this has been our lives. Our communication (except for the wonderful days I have seen him recently) has been phone calls during the day, when he has time, goodnight calls every night and text messages.

I am really counting down the days. It is so close. It is almost over. I can't wait to get re-acquainted with my husband and begin to work on our life again. Amen.